Only in the movies...or our house!!

Okay, so there are scenes that can only happen in movies, right? Nope. They happen at our house all the time. Like today for example. It started right after John left for work. The kids toilet was not working, John forgot to plunge it before he left. Not kidding that 5 minutes after he left, the toilet in the master bath overflowed...thankfully nothing gross in there, but it's still gross none-the-less. I know what you're thinking, why didn't you plunge it yourself? Well, I'm plunger-challenged. I can't do it to save my life. Don't know what's so hard about it, but I am incapable.

So, we're doing pretty good. The kids toilet will flush, just not everything goes down...so we use their toilet for our "business". About 3 o'clock, I hear Cooper stirring from his nap and I think I should take the dog out quick before Cooper really wakes up for good in about 2 minutes. (She's inside today because it's rainy, and I can't leave her out. She's in her crate because she's such a wild beast, she just tackles the kids...but she really does love her crate.) So I have the leash in hand opening the first lock and I hear a scream coming from my room and running. The girls were watching a video. I quickly close the lock, Dancer starts barking and pawing like mad at the cage. I run upstairs to find Emma running down the hall vomiting as she goes.

So, now I have two toilets that don't work, a vomiting child, vomit all down the hall and in my room (plus all over a library book...nice...my shoes...nice...and a bag of Christmas bows under the bed...nice again) Cooper screaming in his crib, a dog barking downstairs, and Halle standing on my bed crying and saying something, which by the way, she's not wearing pants because she for some reason refuses to poop in the potty and I refuse to let her wear pull-ups and I'm sick to death of cleaning poop out of her panties, and I'm unable to make out what she's saying (stupid twin-speak) and I think she's telling me she's just pooped in my bed! (Thankfully she was just pointing out the vomit!!)

I throw Emma in the tub after a quick hose-down and tell her to just play for a minute. I try calling my mom who had taken Madison and Marshall home from VBS. No answer. No answer on her cell phone, it's not even on, just clicks right to voicemail. I am screaming into the phone, "That's what they're for woman...turn it on!!" and realize I've just left that on her voicemail. I frantically call John because I need some serious help here. He says he can come home if I really need him. I tell him to give me 5 more minutes to try and get Mom but to be ready. After 5 minutes, no mom. I try calling him over and over and over and over...where the heck is he? After 30 minutes (I did get Cooper up finally after about 15 minutes and just put a huge box to block the hallway) I get my mom and ask her to come over right away and to bring some carpet cleaner because I'm out.

Mom comes to my rescue and I scrub the floor. I use an entire bottle of carpet cleaner. I call John and have him pick some up on his way home, cause I need to clean it again. That's what I'm going to do right now.

So that was my day. Aren't you jealous?

Ten Things...

Ten Things I Love About Cooper...in no particular order...and there could be a bazillion...

1. anywhere you touch him, he's ticklish

2. his fuzzy blonde hair

3. the way he gets excited and kicks his legs and shakes his head like a madman

4. the piggy face he does

5. his open mouth, teethy, sopping wet kisses

6. he'll eat anything without complaint

7. he loves being read to

8. he clings to me as we're walking down the hall in the morning when he first wakes up

9. when you say it's time for night-night, he grabs Hilton and runs to his room

10. he's only got one mommy, and I'm her!

Flylady

A dear, sweet friend of mine from college, Londa, whom I haven't seen in about 10 years (LOVE AND MISS YOU GIRL!!) told me about this website a few years ago. flylady.com If you have never heard of it, go to it, it is awesome and soooo helpful.

Now, like I said, I've known about this for awhile and have visited in the past, but have never taken the advice and put it into practice. Well, I finally did a few days ago. The site basically helps you "declutter" your life and keep your house up and running without killing yourself. It's all about baby steps to getting your house into shape.

My kitchen has NEVER been cleaner. I'm not kidding. Not the day we moved in, not when my in-laws are coming, not when a babysitter is coming over, not when we're having Bible study...NEVER. I rearranged some drawers so that even our huge container of pens, pencils, sharpies, scissors, etc are in one drawer with paper, tape, paperclips, etc. The only things out on my counters are things I use everyday: coffee pot, toaster, can opener, and cutting board. That's it. Oh, and there is hand soap by the sink. Nothing else.

I even cleared all the kids drawings and pictures off the fridge. I did leave 1 picture of each child on the side, but that's it. Magnets, gone. Doodles, gone. Coupons from pizza places, gone. Cute stories cut out of newspapers, gone. (And I did save the kids drawings, just not on the fridge anymore!)

My husband came home and declared that the kitchen was AWESOME. He had never seen it look better. So now I'm on to our bedroom today. Why is it that the one place that's supposed to be a retreat always looks like a dumping ground? Not anymore.

One down, two to go

We've had a very sad day at our house. A beloved member of our family passed away yesterday, but it wasn't revealed until today... at least to certain members of our family.

Sammy the fish has gone to the great fishtank in the sky. Sammy was Marshall's fish. He actually took the news quite well. I told him as we were walking in Wal-Mart today. The kids always have to look at the fish, and well, I thought it a most appropriate time to disclose the unhappy news. He had a very sad face at first, then saw the African Frogs (they are these really cool frogs that live underwater...they don't need air!!), his face lit up, and he asked if he could get one. I told him to wait until we went to the pet store. The fish from Wal-Mart never fare very well for us.

As Sammy was flushed down the toilet Marshall said, "Swim to the ocean dear, sweet Sammy. You were the best fish I ever had." He was the only fish he ever had, but I guess Sammy doesn't know that, or ever will for that matter!

So, now we are down 1 fish, with only 2 left to "swim to the ocean". I am not going to replace them as they die. Just remove the tanks and hide them until the kids can clean them themselves...I can only do so much ya know!

Pulling Teeth

Okay, not literally "pulling teeth", but sometimes that's what dinner feels like. I know I've posted about this before, but for goodness sake, could I please get a break?

We had ham, corn, green beans, potatoes, and for good measure I threw some applesauce on the plates cause the kids love it so much. Before the food was on the table we were waiting for Marshall to pray (he was in the bathroom). Madison kept saying how she was "starving". Marshall arrives, we pray, I present the food. We then have a conversation that goes like this:

Madison: I don't eat meat.

Me: Um, did you eat a hamburger last night at Wendy's and ask for another one?

Madison: Yes.

Me: Then you eat meat. Do you love Chick-Fil-A's chicken nuggets and eat a bazillion of them?

Madison: Yes.

Me: Then you eat meat.

Madison: Okay. I don't eat this meat. What animal is it?

Me: I'm not telling you and it doesn't matter anyway cause you're eating it.

Madison: (Well, she didn't actually say anything, just sat with her arms crossed and her lips in a tight thin line.)

Me: You're eating.

Madison: (Crossed arms, lips in thin line.)

Me: Eat or go to bed.

Madison: I'm not hungry...I ate a lot of lunch and breakfast.

Me: Didn't you just say how starving you were?

Madison: (Thinking for a minute) Yeah, but it went away...I'll wait for breakfast.

I could go on, but I won't, it would take too long! She did eat after I informed her her choices were to eat or go to bed. She tried to negotiate just being in her room, not from this momma I told her. And after she began eating she said it "wasn't so bad and I know I'm eating a pig,. You know like 'Babe' pig. How can you make me eat 'Babe'?" I had to cough to cover up my laugh.

Now there may be some of you who think my stand is wrong, or too harsh. However, I am sick to death of throwing away food. I used to cook for 7 people (the number in our family). Not anymore. Now I cook for like 3 1/2 because none of them eat very much. They do have their favorites that they eat and eat and eat, but I think you can die from mac & cheese or PB&J poisoning, can't you? And I am very thankful that they all really like veggies and LOVE fruit. It just irks me that when I actually spend the time to cook a well-balanced meal they don't appreciate or enjoy it. Maybe as time goes by...but I'm not holding my breath!! Oh the drama of dinner.